Today i skipped sch.. 1st day of sch and i skipped!! haha.. =X kinda feel bad.. i am suppose to go sch today to look for duckie, but i didn’t.. i went to meet him (which i’ll not elaborate any further).. and after that i went to meet duckie.. duckie was very angry with me for 2 reasons:

1) i didn’t go to sch to find him each time i say i would,
2) bcos i went to meet him.

ok, i admit i’m bad.. but i just want to hear what he wants to tell me.. he told me that his spine might got prob and he might not be able to enter into the police force. and i told him, i knew he’s not going to get in.. he said i’m lookin down at him.. he got low blood pressure, it was darling who told me that he can’t get in de loh.. and when i told him that, he say he also got friends in police force and i’m not the only one who have friends in police force. well, den i told him “den it’s gd loh”.. anyone who wants to be a police force must be strong, but he’s so weak in physical.. not say i’m looking down on him, but look at him.. sigh.. i just knew.. but anyways, he’s not important anymore.. and i dont really care about whether he’s alive or dead.. he said when everyone is stopping him, i’m asking him to go and die.. den why didn’t he die? why until now he’s stil alive? lol..

duckie cried. when i meet him, we walk into paragon and he went into the toilet and i saw his eyes red. den he walked to the second level and sat down on the bench and asked tissue from me.. so i knew he’s crying.. i don’t know wat to do, but he want me to tell him “don’t let me see him, otherwise he will beat him or slap him”.. it’s not worth it.. cos frm today onwards i don’t care about him anymore.. the whole nite, he was saying i’m the one looking for guys.. and when i asked him he got go know girls, he denied.. lol.. LIAR.. he’s such an asshole, what makes me wanna believe in him rite? i managed to make duckie laugh again, and i don’t wish to sour our relationship bcos of an asshole like him.. thus, i choose to ignore him and not going to have any contacts with him anymore. and i’m serious.. i told duckie i’ll try to love him so i must do what i promised.. and i think he (my ex) has ruin me enough.. i waited for him for almost a yr and he said i waited for him for only 6 mths. and we are only in a r/s for 6 mths plus, he said we are in a r/s for 8 mths (which includes after we break up.).. that’s holy crap.. he can keep saying i dont need duckie all i need is someone to accompany me when i’m lonely but he’s wrong.. lol.. gosh, i have know him so long and yet, that’s the conclusion he could get out of me.. oh man.. and yes, i’m disappointed when he said that, but it’s not once he said that, he said it many times before and this shall be the last time i ever gonna mention him in my new blog.. i shall write down what he said:

I feel like a girl in this relationship. and it’s always guys who hurt the girls and even so, the girl will still love that guy even though that guy can cheat on her. guys are bastards, really loh.. they only want girls for sex and when they are sick of their gf, then they will find a new one and break up.. only guys will change feelings.. i have nvr see a girl like u before, u are like special.. (so he was saying, i went to look for new guys.. flirt ard.. i did what he says. if he say i’m a bitch, i will be a bitch for him to see. if he says i’m flirting ard, i flirt ard for him to see. the only thing that he said and i didn’t do is he said i fuck ard.. i have change of heart.. that’s what he means. he said even so, he still wan me back.. he was very upset that i didn’t want to marry him anymore.. when he asked me if i’m happy, i told him yes i’m happy now.. at least with duckie i’m nvr sad.. perhaps sometimes got attitude for awhile and he will say funny things to make me happy again.. even sometimes when duckie is unhappy, i tease and make him feel happy again.. the feeling with duckie is different.. if i were to patch up with piggy, i will feel damn stressed.. sorry, i don’t even know who am i now.. but if i’m still little moomooz, i wouldn’t be his little moomooz anymore..) but sorry i can’t stand ppl say me until lidat.. i might suffer a breakdown.. i don’t wan that kind of relationship anymore.. so i told him, do whatever u wan, just stop writing and talking about me.. =)

So, me and duckie went to watch movie (Flight Plan).. we watched the 11.25pm showtime.. the show quite ok lah.. got the suspence.. lol.. gosh.. and we keep joking.. the guy who sat beside duckie fall aslp.. so we are guessing whether he’s there to watch movie or pay for the ticket jus to get some slp.. further more, that guy is riding a bike.. lol.. oh well.. lol.. the show finished at 1am (ard there lah..) den we went home.. cos he said his sis is going to his hse, so he needs to get hm early.. so he sent me hm first.. and on the way hm, i asked him about his ex gf.. lol.. i realised i’m very ‘se’.. cos i asked him whether his ex gf’s breasts is big.. LOL.. oops.. =X still got B cup.. sian.. mine is so small..!!! LOL.. when eddie say i’m small (i know he’s saying i’m a small kid), i asked him i where small.. lol.. anyways, it’s always curious about other’s past relationship esp duckie’s.. lol.. i’ll still be a virgin till the day i get married! hohoho!!!

This will be my new beginning. Actually i’m quite sick of the past think of it makes me sick. Really. How can i please everyone? It’s beyond what I can do now. And i’m not going mention about the past here. cos i really wanted a new start. =)