even though i’m aching all over my body, but geez.. things work out for me today.. with a little bit of attitude. as usual, when it comes to she-who-shall-not-be-named, my attitude towards her SUCK.. realised something? each time she’s the shift-in-charge, i fucking have NO chance to CLOSE bar when i’m SUPPOSED to. thanks. and in the end, she got some problem with the cashier and i was giggling behind. loL~ that makes my night better.. muahaha.. oh, there is this guy customer who asked for his bill 3 times and each time i couldnt give him bcos the cashier was cock up.. =] ooPs.. =P and in the end he walked to the cashier wanting to pay the bill by calculating the amt himself.. and when he took out his cash, the cashier is ready again.. lol.. and he keep calling my name and den tell me his name is call jeffery.. lol.. there is something wrong with the TCC card redemption thingy, oh watever.. i’m not the one doing cashier.. and end up suzy & sue helped she-who-shall-not-be-named to close bar. pUI~! i vacuumed the floor and den mop the floor bcos the rest are busy helping the she-who-shall-not-named to close bar.. when the she-who-shall-not-named went for her break, i took over the bar and helped her do some washing and of cos, i’m such a nice person and to show her that i’m nice, i helped her to do pre-close for the bar.. of cos to stall time so that i can ‘save up’ the drinking glasses so she could wash HERSELF.. pUI~ what kind of stupid bitch is she? she only wash the cups & glasses and NVR wash the spoons.. well, did she expect the spoons will wash themselves? muahahaha, and when she-who-shall-not-be-named came back from her break, she was like “wah, so many glasses”.. YES, i did it!! muahahaha~ and damien prepared 1 mushroom VAV for me.. yay~ i’m so happy bcos i got food. muahaha. and fang chew looked weird today.. without styling his hair i guess. oh btw, did i mention tim looked like a mushroom when he didn’t apply any gel on his hair? DAMN! he looked like a mushroom (chinese mushroom some more), i just can’t happy laughing.. and today, he became Captain Hook. =) with the paper cup and my paper ‘hook’.. we all had some laughter.. =] after all he can’t hook up with that ‘hook’. =P i simply HATE she-who-shall-not-be-named. =) guobin (my punching bag) have already close bar for 6 times and i.. only 2 times.. when will she get transfeR??? and when guobin told me that i’m suppose to close bar and end up she-who-shall-not-be-named doing cos she wants.. i feel like.. ARGH.. go n die man.. muahahaha. curse and swear at her.. good saying, Once a bitch, always a bitch. =]

and today ah ma was complaining because mama nvr tell her abt the medicine and she tell me instead of her bcos she’s the one who’s taking care of my elder bro.. =.= was it suppose to be my fucking problem? why complain to mE? den she was like, u better make sure he take his medicine day & night blah blah.. it’s getting on my nerves.. damn.. ma chiam got my problem..

met up with duckie today. he came to look for me.. bcos he wants to see me.. i’m getting a bit too tired of, let’s break up.. and den we got back together the next day.. i find us so silly.. it’s like “let’s break up” is nothing to us.. =.= and of cos i wasn’t too happy when he say go eat and den when we reach there he doesnt wanna eat anymore bcos everything is closed.. and those stalls that are still opened, he can’t eat. -_- he shd know that since i’m working until 10pm.. by then, everything will be closed and whatever is left, is whatever he can’t eat. he was lidat ytd too man.. tell me, how not to get flare up? my attitude towards him wasnt that good too.. very bad.. but den, i can’t control.. i hate it when he talk until he’s going aust and wouldnt be coming back. each time he talks, he behave as if he’s going to die the next min.. -_- den wat’s the point of us going out? whatever.. sometimes i’m soooo sick of thinking and i think i shd fall into deep slp n nvr wake up again so i dun have to face so many craps. i feel like after so many things, nothing seems to be right.. after so many things, i’m still so lost.. what shd i do man.. i have no money, no talent.. basically, i have nothing.. i didn’t want to treat him this way oso.. but sometimes, i m too straight forward and say whatever things tat’s in my head and ‘shoot’ at his words.. i feel like.. “damn.. i shdnt have done that.” and when we are in the train he mention things like “i’m dying” and den i was saying jokingly “wanna die, die 1 side”.. and he say he was hurt by that.. =.= whatever.. nothing i say is correct anyways.. time to go slp.. i still have to wake up a bit early and get the sim card for val’s fren and pass it to her.. which means i have ALOT of places to go. fuck.

i had a very bad day ytd.. it all started when i woke up in the morning and my left leg hooked onto the bed bar when i was trying to get out of the bed to switch off the fan.. and den my right leg hit onto the bed bar causing a little swollen.. and my head almost hit the floor.. and i hurt my back.. i slept with discomfort in me ytd nite.. i keep tossing here and there trying to find a suitable and comfortable position to slp..

things at work got worse.. sigh.. i only check where is my station and i just go stand there forgetting the rest of the station and when i took order from table 3.. the guy ordered a dessert which i neglected.. bcos i was busy with other customers.. and as usual, pat go ard giving orders.. =.= outrageous… who do she think she is? so the customer at table 3 complaint abt that and tim wasnt too happy abt it.. and of cos, i have fault too.. my fault is i din inform whoever is in-charge of station 3 and that person happens to be suzy.. and, i only gotta know it after the customer complaint. and when pat came to talk to me & suzy, i was ignoring her somehow. c’mon, she’s a floater, i’m a server.. with so many tables to handle, and i’m such a forgetful person.. they expect me to remember everyone’s order so everything can come out promptly? fuck it. my mood is bad enough.. but damien always manage to make me happy by giving me some wedges with cheese dip to eat! hahaha. he still want me to work until 10pm so he can treat me fishball noodle? haha.. or rather, i treat him? =.=

after tat i went to meet up with duckie… if he din come to wait for me, i could have work until 10pm instead of 8pm.. who will say no to extra money esp, got OT.. sigh.. den he asked me what to eat and i have no idea so i say go home.. on the way home, we didn’t speak any words until when we are going to reach JP soon, den he say “lend me 5 mins of ur time, got things to tell u”.. when i heard that i was like “what are u going to say to me this time?”.. harsh i may seemed to be.. den i walked towards JP bcos he say he wants to eat and den he say he cannot eat things that are hard.. how am i suppose to know what he can eat or what he cant eaT? am i suppose to be like a god knowing everything without telling me? am i? den we walked to the playground we always go.. den he say things like “i think u shd forget me”, “i think u shd stop wasting ur time on me”, “i wun live past 30 yrs old”.. everything else i can accept but definately not those sentences he said to me. i can accept that his heart got a hole.. i can.. but i can’t accept he saying those things den then next min tell me he doesn’t wanna break up with me, but he got no choice.. it’s hard to make this decision.. and since he made this decision what makes him think that i will listen to him when i dun listen to everyone? of cos he went to seek help from darling.. after everything i said, darling said i’n black hearted bcos i refuse to say whatever is on my mind to him. bren say i shd go talk to him. but i nvr will. he erase me from his life.. so why shd i bother when he wants to push me away? so what if i care? he doesnt want me to care.