1st pic – Pic of my supposed to be pink color form for collection of the passport. 2nd pic – that’s me & amy at the bus to another location which i forgotten to upload ytd.

yay!! i can collect my passport this coming sat (11.02.2006)..den i can go JB with duckie already. =) maybe i can even go KL with damien & bren. =) it keeps me excited.. but now, i got headache and i feel so weak all over my body.. need to slp early today.. i will wake up early this sat to collect my passport.. think of it, i might lose my sleep. hahaha. =X

I wanted to make duckie happy today since he looked and sounded so sian over his family stuffs.. and when i say “dun so sian lah, i treat u eat”.. den he say, “i got so sian meh?”… the sian face is already written all over his face.. den he kept asking me “i look sian?”, “am i very sian?”… it drives me crazy.. sigh.. we walked from heeren to park mall to take bus and in the bus, my headache came back and he just kept talking.. when i was slpg, he wake me up… i was a bit paranoid by his actions and the way he talked.. sigh.. and slowly i fall aslp again.. and my head was so heavy till i can’t open my eyes.. and something bite my eyes.. a bit swollen.. when i asked him to look at my eyes at the mrt station on the way to town, he didn’t even bother.. i’m quite upset over it.. he later den told me he was given a chance to have his Viva next monday and he told me he dun wanna go.. i was quite disappointed with what he said.. when sch gave him a chance, he doesn’t wanna treasure it.. if he dun wanna go, sch might think he’s insincere.. but it’s his own decision.. and he told me later on, he will go.. there are problems in his family and i can’t help him.. sigh.. whatever it is, he shd know i’m at least still by his side.. but this few days, i just feel so sick.. =(

1st pic – taken after some photo shooting (fake eye lashes, eye liner), 2nd pic – make up~, 3rd pic – at playground near air base.

1st pic – at playground near air base, 2nd pic – taken at amy‘s hse, 3rd pic – take at the living room’s sofa (i like this pic).

1st pic – comfort is important, 2nd pic – me & darling at amy‘s hse living room, 3rd pic – at the playground.

1st pic – me & mich (did u see who’s the extra behind), 2nd pic – darling & me, 3rd pic – me, mich, darling & amy~

Amy woke up me at about 1plus.. she called my house if not i might over slept.i promised to help her by being her model.. hahaha. usual habit.. den i went to CCK to meet her, mich and darling. was suppose to meet duckie but everything ended so late so i decided not to meet him.. went to the beach for photo shooting. the wind there was so damn big that i almost fly away.. was having fun with playing the bubble thingy and posing.. well, i’m poser.. =X den after that we changed venue to the playground near the air base.. and the officer came out to inform us not to shoot the building because they have very high sensitive cameras.. duh.. it’s not as if the building is damn nice to take. we cont with our photo taking.. after that we went to amy‘s house to sort things out because everything is so messy.. after the photos will turn out nice alright.. =X amy‘s mum cooked for us.. so nice of her.. and it’s like we only rest for 10 mins and food is ready on the table. she cooked kang kong, fish and egg for us and we even got satay. the kang kong was so nice till i ate quite alot.. =X den we went to sort out and gossip for awhile. we planned to play mahjong together since everyone of us knows how to play. LOL! ok lah, i’m tired to write anymore. i will write again tml. =)

i had my VIVA today….

I dragged duckie to sch early so i can practise my VIVA presentation slides.. i got so nervous.. =X but i had my fav xia mian today.. but i’m not happy.. maybe i was over gan jiong with the VIVA that i don’t think that xia mian taste nice at all… =X the presentation was good but i screw it up with my report… ARGH.. ok, i tried not to think about it…

went to town with duckie after VIVA had dinner at P.S the indonesian food and it tastes normal… weird and there is always a LONG queue for that.. and after that we went to cineleisure to take neoprint!! wahaha.. after that we went to take 174 to JP.. slept thru out the journey.. feel like my head is goin to burst soon. sigh.. i just thought duckie wasn’t very happy when i say i’m lazy to walk or if he wants me to walk, he has to change his shoes with me.. did i say anything wrong? my leg is so tired after wearing those heels and walk whole day.. head is so pain till i refuse to open my eyes.. we went to the playground anyways.. i take a rest there till about almost 10pm den we headed home.

was suppose to work tml.. but i gotta help amy with her project by being her model for the day. and hope the effect will be nice.. or at least i hope i got helped her.. sigh.. will be replacing bren on sat instead.. =X will be meeting duckie after his work tml. for dinner. =)

I have finally send my application form for my passport!!! yippeee.. this means that i have $50 lesser in my bank. and finally duckie can go home! i dont have to worry about him staying overnight outside. so happy now. just now we went to JP to eat KFC den we went to chinatown to walk.. but the crowd there was so pathetic, so we had chicken rice there and den we took 174 to JP again. =) i have VIVA tml.. i’m kinda scare now.. what will happen to me? sigh.. ok, i still haven’t touch on my avfe assignment 2 which was due long time ago and i still have to prepare my viva. =) i will ask duckie help me scan my pic so i can post it online. kekez. excited. mayb i might get my passport this week since it stated it tooks 3 working days to process. =]

I’m so frustrated. I’m so furious. Some times i wondered why on earth did his parents do this to him. It’s not as if they chased him out of the house it will change the fact that he got himself debarred. They signed the debarrment form and chase him out of the house. and now? he’s outside alone. i don’t even know which part of hougang he’s at. Damn. and i can’t even help him. Sometimes I find it too ridiculous for his parents to over react over the fact that he got debarred. and no matter how traditional parents are they, they shdn’t and nvr slap their kid and chase them out of the house. ARGH. i’m so upset now. zzzz whatever, no matter how happy i tried to be, i can nvr be happy. i feel very stressed and helpless whenever duckie keep saying i’m his everything. i wanted to help him but i have my limits. i feel so damn helpless. i wanted to ask if my fren could let him stay at their house but i don’t wanna cause inconvenience to them. i really don’t know what i can do for him man. and he’s outside alone in a rainy nite. damn. and i can’t cheer him up. zzzz. stupid gf.

i don’t understand why his parents have to be so cruel to him. sometimes, i wondered if i’m the one who is bringing all the bad luck to him. he got chased out of his house bcos of his debarrment. sigh, but i can’t help him at all. before i knew his father knew abt his debarrment, i went out with my sis to Attica… and… i didn’t dare to tell him after he told me that his father knew abt the debarrment. sigh. but in the end, i still told him bcos he was worried about me.. and i don’t wanna lie to him by saying i’m slpg at hm. life is bad till i have no words to describe it. one word: Suck.

1st pic – no doubt, amin & me are the famous 007, 2nd pic – $1200 fine + revoke of licence, damn sad, 3rd pic – captain nana & me.

went back to TCC to get pay today. was surprised cos the pay was far too early. and the cut off is till 19th jan. i had a little bit of fun.. amin keep disturbing me and he even put my bag at the top of the cupboard. stupid. but lucky, i’m smart. =P abd kept touching my neck, bren came too. =X but still, it’s some money. i have to pay present for duckie and make passport this month so, da ta.. no much money left. but there is always enough for me to spend. =] duckie’s officially been debarred… and he said something like “i dun want u to waste ur time on me. and i think i’m so useless.” i thought the next thing he will say is, “Let’s break up”.. but he didn’t.. i cried bcos of these sentences he said. i don’t really care if he could study.. maybe he’s good at some other things except studies. like me, i could barely pass everything. and i didn’t even wake up on time for my AVFE filming today. damn. but then, duckie said he wun wanna break up with me becos he like me too much.. and seriously, if he break up with me.. my heart aches. =[ and i also dun wanna break up with him.. even though we had a few conflicts, but that can be solved. i told him damien ask me go KL on the 18th Feb, since he’s going back to do something which i forgotten, because he wants to bring me ard to eat, duckie was like… a bit dun like lah if i have to stay overnite there but if i want to, i still can go.. and today his ex went to look for him and when duckie‘s boss ask who is she, she said she’s duckie‘s gf i was like.. KNS! DUH~! liar. we spent many hrs at the esplanade there to talk. wanted to go MOS with my sis but i changed mind bcos duckie needs me. it’s ok, i can go anytime i like when duckie feels better. =) ciao. i’m tired already.. =)

was so flare up with pat today, was suppose to closing for bar. but the moment she came back, she chased me out from the bar saying she need to be familiar with bar closing. duh. until now i still haven’t do closing bar properly on my own. damn. but i have no choice cos she is the shift in charge. arghhhh.. and it was pretty obivous that jiayong was waiting for her to finish work bcos only damien worked till 10pm. =X but nvm, after work i went to lao pa sat with damien to eat. treat him fishball noodle since he helped me carry my laptop. duckie as usual sent me alot of sms and gave me 2 missed calls when he said finish chatting then sms him. i wasn’t really very please with it bcos he always does that when i’m with them. but nvm, he was only very gan jiong about me that’s all. ciao.

1st pic – me with sophia’s spec, 2nd pic – me with bren’s purple spec, 3rd pic – me & mon cheri


1st pic – me & suzy, 2nd pic – abd (the guy always attack my neck!!), 3rd pic – me & suzy again~

i love to work~ weeeeee. if i dun work i feel like i’m so empty. working keeps me alive. at least i can crap and laugh along with my colleagues sharing jokes ard, crap around, got bullied by abd & amin.. kekez. erin told me she finally saw darling. lol. and darling told her that i always complain about pat. wahahaha. =) i had late lunch or rather dinner with suzy & sophia at TCC after work. we had chix wings, mushroom VAV, wedges & macaroni. =) we shared everything and yes, as usual, i ate alot bcos the rest can’t eat anymore. lol. no choice man. so i ate 3 chix wings. kekez. after we ate finish, we just sat there and chill. crap and gossip abit. well, that’s what girls do when they are free i supposed. keke. and aBOU 6plus we saw bren coming and she was there to take back her uniform and so she had her dinner at TCC too. so me and sophia acc her while suzy went off early. suppose to meet duckie but i was soo upset with him so i went home dun care about him. humph. he sounded like he shouted at me in the fone and i was like.. it’s not a big deal why is he shouting at me? he got surprise for me to cheer me up actually. sunflowers. my fav. yes. but i wun get it till Valentine’s day. but it’s ok. worth the wait. flowers. DAMN EXP!! omg. but he had already paid for it and that makes him a poor man. but it’s ok, he can always use my atm card. =) even though there isn’t alot money inside, but it’s enough to buy food. lub u duckie. for letting me know that u really cares about me. but i’m really feeling down today. =( u r much much better than those tom, dick, harry who claims every single credit for themselves. and looking at the pics we took during the paintball and talk about it was hilarious. =)

Man are the cause of my problem. Perhaps I owe them in my previous life but that doesn’t mean anything. who knows whether each of us has a previous life or not? Me? i don’t really believe in such things. But the things he said to me is getting worse after each smses. i can’t really believe it. i’m not that free to bother about him. he was trying to make my life tough. he looked down on me. hum ji hum lan? i dun have a lan. but he’s always hum ji. damn, i’m so scare of gangster. damn. i m reali hum ji. at least i dun behave like a sissy. reali. he say he will make problems for me if i refused to pay him whatever i owe him. and when i told him to print his bank statement, he said he dun have to follow what i said and he said he oso passed me some money when he saw me. but the problem is, he only rem the part he passed me money but did not rem the part i gave his money back. being accused by him once more. well, but still it doesnt make any differences. he always accuse me. example: cindy chuan’s incident. bcos of her pa jiao-ness i got accused again. thanks to her. the more i talk to him, the more he will say i’m scare. the more i tried to defend myself he will say i’m finding excuse or i talk cock. but the person who is talking cock rite now is him. and yes, no matter what he says, i wun pay him a single cent. i WUN. pay him i got scolded bitch, i dun pay him i got scolded bitch too. it doesn’t really make any different whether i pay him or not. it’s not whether he understand me or not. but it seems like he doesn’t understand what i’m saying. do whatever u wan. overboard, den u will be sorry. police is the last person i wanna turn to. and talking to a person like him really insult me. crude person he will always be. let’s see who is harrassing who. my smses to him was always more civilized than him. at least i dun say “cb fucking bitch” like he does. =] a poet indeed. i lose. and what makes him think that duckie will pay him the money i owed him? duckie is not my atm nor he’s my money. or shd i say he is not as generous as him? to give me money so i can xian guys? haha. i need a million to do so. he looked down on me anyways. he even blamed me for duckie’s almost debarrment. haha. i have got nothing to do with his debarrment man. i did not stopped him from going to sch or whatsoever. and he even blamed me by saying that he got all As for his subj in year 1 and after he was with me in year 2, his grades was all Cs. and i say, i could pass all my subj even with lousy results and after i’m together with him, i failed 2 modules in year 2. i can blame who? and he even say he helped me wrote the letter for my year 1 almost debarrment. which means i have to say thanks to him for helping me. the clever thing to do is, stop talking to such person to prevent any thing frm happening. it’s not bcos i’m coward. but bcos i’m still a nice person (quoted from sze tien’s sms as of 31st oct 2006). did i mention he told me last nite that he got attached? i didn’t know someone who got attached is even more free. wondered why did he get attached in the 1st placE? that’s very lucky. one poor girl offered to save the rest of the world. great. he can save money on prositution. he said, he wanna get back the money from me so he can spend with his gf. but who knows? maybe he needs money to go clubbing so he can touch or rather xian girls(he said guys who go clubbings like to touch or go there to know girls). he always said that to me. girls who go clubbing are bitch (that’s what he used to scold me when i go clubbing.), those girls are loose. haha. well, his frens are so damn loose den so is he. cos they went with him.