it’s MASON’s 21st bday today!! hahaha. and he got sabo by the rest of the kitchen staffs.. and he’s… so untidy! haha. the 1st time i see the kitchen in a REAL mess. it was like they are having war right after lunch time. hahaha. it’s funny to see mason bluffing his way and hug jiayong and make sure the rest of the people gets dirty as well. it’s funny. and i had a good laugh. it’s a joyous occasion and he’s happy.. taking pic with the rest of the kitchen staffs at the end of the sabotage. hahaha. and they bought him a birthday cake as well. i didn’t take any pics bcos i was doing ordering. after work i went to meet sue because we are chilling out together. so i went to paragon to meet her.. and after that we went to, i think it’s, emerald orchard’s foodcourt and sit there and chit for awhile while waiting for her time to break fast. did i mention that Fasting month a.k.a Ramadan starts on last sundaY? yup, so we waited till she can break fast and eat. after dinner we went to CNL to check if amin is working.. and he’s not there because he went to office and we saw taha, once again. haha. the ironic thing is if we see taha, amin isn’t working.. and amin works closing, we wouldnt see taha. LOL. funny. anyways, we crapped with amin.. disturb disturb.. chat for awhile den we headed home because sue is falling sick. she has the same syndrome as fizah.. both of them has sore throat, and a nose that runs. poor thing. hope they have plenty of rest. get well sooN~

Seriously it’s a waste of time to put in effort to make certain someone to realise that he/she is an important friend when that certain someone doesn’t even give a fucking damn to u.

she said people would tolerate my temper but she wouldn’t and this sets me pondering what have i done to her that makes her think that way. was it because of the “Bday incident” or whatever that triggers her to think that way. whatever it is, she doesn’t even bother to tell me what’s wrong and i feel so.. *wondering* and i asked her if i throw my temper on her? she said it doesn’t has to be on her. C’mon, she’s looking on the surface stuffs? if she was referring about me calling out bin bin‘s full name when he failed to reply me, i apologised and explained to him why i was so pissed. how can she judge me lidat? damnit. i hardly throw my temper now and she said i throw my temper? causing problems for people? create more problems? and when i asked myself, how often do i see her around at workplace? 1 or 2 times or sometimes none? i have offended her that way? gosh, that’s so bad. and this shows how much our “friendship” worth. when she was there with her mum for dinner, i tried to talk to her, she ignored me.. and she just said to me that she’s tired to deal with me. it’s not like i have forced her in ANYWAY to meet me up, accompany me go shopping, have dinner like she did with her friends, go out for dinner, for movies, even to JB.. ha. =D she asked me out, she cancelled at the very last min. i asked her out, she agreed and den cancelled. set this aside, she’s not convincing to me enough, and all she had to say was “den u can dealt with ur disappointment and find someone who doesn’t disappoint u”. when i told her i was disppointed with the way she treated me. and that came out from HER hand (bcos we were smsing each other for awhile ONLY cos she doesn’t even bother rem?).. i was, and am upset about this. but apparently she doesn’t even wanna tell me what’s wrong because she needs to study, get her license, teach her kids. =_= she talked like during these process, i have stopped her from doing all these. she is NOT fair towards me. and since when i have to drag her into ANY of my fucking problems? which i don’t even have? When was the fucking last time she asked me “how are u?”, or when was the fucking last time she bothered to talk to me like we used to be? she has things to accomplish. i don’t have? am i not a human too?

How do u feel when u talked to someone and he/she doesn’t acknowledge u? I feel like an idiot. that’s how i feel each time i talked to someone and he/she doesn’t acknowlegde my pressence. it felt like i have just talked to a wall, or something similar to that. Can’t they just reply with an “ok”, or nod their head to acknowledge to what i have told him/her instead of just keeping mum and continue to do whatever they are doing. and den when i repeat myself, they would say “yah, i heard it”.. thanks people. this is how i f**king feel.. i’m pissed at these kind of people. sometimes i feel it rude. c’mon guys, to reply someone is a very tough thing to do? it’s not. with people always treating me invisible, that’s the worse of my life. i wanted to be “visible” to that certain person and den i found myself reluctant to do so. What would you do if things like that happened to u? tell me. to take the initiative or wait? however, both of us will be at the “losing” point, because someone has to give in. and who will that be? me or her? we don’t talk anymore. don’t smile to each other. don’t crap. don’t play around. but then, it’s only towards me. what about the rest of the people? it’s the same. as in, different treatment from what i can see. and i have no idea why she’s not talking to me. she hasn’t talk to me since 2 weeks ago. and, i have no idea. i tried not to feel so pissed off each time i see her, but.. i just can’t help it.. or it was just me? hah… life is so funny sometimes, when u stop what u r doing for awhile and think back, we have been thru this “shit” before. so why let history repeat itself? g0damnit. or was it humans just don’t learn from their mistakes? no idea.. but certainly i learnt.. everything over and over again.. however, past few days was quite a happy experience. it was only when i see her, and this kind of feelings comes back to me.. sigh..

i had soOo many things to update. gosh, but i’m so tired now. so it’s time for bed, and update tml. hah. i can’t even type properly. gosh. nitey world. =]

let’s see.. to start of with, i was late for work today.. super late. almost an hour late.. so i arrived at almost 8am instead of 7am.. and tim said i was to make up the late hr after work which means i have to work until 4pm instead of the usual 3pm. =] i smsed tim the moment i wake up at 6.20am.. and lucky he’s cool about it.. and he even offer me his sandwich. yuMmy, i love ham sandwich but i don’t like tcc sandwich.. it reminds me of my sec sch life whereby the 8 of us (u know who u r~~), will bring lunch box to sch during our sec 5 life. =) and den after that me & bin bin walk to FM to visit wati and just nice it’s her breaktime.. and i have to wait for fang chew anyways.. and after that bin bin went off, me & fang chew went to chinatown because he wants to take pics of the lanterns, which we, ended up, didn’t.. hahaha. we went to visit damien because he’s on MC today and we had nothing else to do, and i’m going to doze off any moment. and we went to bugis to have our dinner and i still ate my dinner even though i kept saying i’m on diet. haha. lame.. and den we sat there and chat for a while den we walk to city hall to take bus home. and fang chew acc me take bus because he said i’m tired.. oh well.. watever, im gonna head off for my bed soon.. cos i miss my elmo~ little boOboo~~~~ but she’s not here.

chilling out with sue means laughter and craziness. haha. and i love to chill out with her. =] that’s how life shd be. and everything that is unhappy for me this week is gone. worked morning, 9-5, today and everything went smoothly and of cos with everyone’s “professionalism” which mon cherie keep repeating. HAHAHA. it’s kinda funny lah.. cos i was saying to him “to encourage u, i helped u top up the ice till the rim because i know u will need it”.. and he got cursed, he used the ice till it left half in the ice box? container? who cares? and he said he wants to kill me. HAHAHA. funny. and he become more daring till he will hit me too. so i was saying “grow up already. got wings already. now can fly already.” in chinese to him. and i had so much laughter working with them. =] and he keep saying me about my “professionalism”.. haha. was it supposed to be compliment or something else? lol. anyways, i accompanied fang chew to chinatown to buy the non stick pan for his work since i’m waiting for sue too. and den 3 of us chill out together.. and coincidentally, me & him was wearing black. =_= went to have dinner at kfc and feel like i got cheated because i only had 2 drumsticks.. and the person didn’t inform me that if i wait a little while longer, i could have something else. =.= thanks eh. anyways, den we went to check out if amin is working but it’s his OFF day.. aaawww.. den we walk ard and i bought a belt for myself.. and walked past tcc again and saw taha and went in to disturb and we ended up chilling there. LOL.. had 1 american cheese cake & chocolate charlotte. =) 1 for 1. how nice of them. had drinks of cos. and we took a LOT of pics man. will upload once i borrow the camera from fang chew to upload. =) it’s a nice day to chill out. and of cos, i love taking pics. HAHAHA.

he apologised for telling me off by saying he’s gonna transfer me out to CBJ ytd. and den again the reason why he wants to transfer me out of RX was because he feels that we (me & she who shall not be named 2) can no longer work together. i have no idea how she who shall not be named 2 backstabbed me.. but if the things that she said has this kind of effect on me, den it must be serious. am i right to say that? no matter how i dislike the person, i still have the “respect” for that person.. and if the person cannot respect the way people respect them, den how the hell is that person gonna gain respect from the people they work with? there is reali no way… and unless we can work together, den i don’t have to be transfer out of RX.. but the thing is, is she willing to? she’s over-sensitive over small matters.. and look at the way she handle things? grow up. she’s not rational enough. and after certain matters had happened, she will pretend not to see me, or she will never look at me.. and she don’t talk to me at all. it’s not my fault. like when she’s angry or something, her tone towards us is not that good too. well, at least i still treat her as my junior captain and give her the respect she deserved. otherwise i might scold some unpleasant things to her. but i give in.. because we are talking about working as a team here. so no matter what she did or said to me, i put it aside and still willing to work with her. but c’mon? she complaint about my attitude.. why don’t she go and reflect her attitude too? enough of this matter.. it’s true that it takes 2 hands to clap.. if i’m only the one willing to put everything aside and work together and she’s not willing, den it doesn’t work.. we are talking about compromise. no compromise, we cannot co-exist together. if u guys get what i mean. it will be unfair because of her i get transfer out. i’m dead serious about this.

i’m crying in my heart. i’m crying physically too. why can’t he be fair to me? why can’t he just let me stay since he had already let me stay for 2 months when i was supposed to get transfer out of RX to CBJ? then why the sudden decision of tranferring me out to CBJ again? sometimes i don’t understand how things work for him. the he who shall not be named… but everyone knows.. i don’t wanna mention names here.. but i’m just upset with this “sudden” decision. no, i’m not reali upset. but what i’m really upset is his “i-dun-care-about-ur-well-being” tone. his tone hurts me. and i tried to be tough but obviously, i’m not a tough person. when fizah and starkey went into the kitchen and my tears couldn’t help but to flow out. i cant suppress this kind of emotions.. or am i too emotional? and i went to the toilet.. i wished i could cry out loud. but i have to control myself, bcos i know if i did that i’m gonna stay in the toilet for a long time. and den i went to for my training lesson.. it’s cool.. and i was happy for the last 3 hours.. laughing out loud and saw uncle jeremy there. threatened to report me to SPCA bcos i’m a pet. lol. lame. i just have to keep irritate him by calling him uncle. hahaha. i partnered with my “son” who is fizah’s bro.. and was happy there.. den i went to meet sue to meet shawn to have ben & jerry’s ice cream. his treat. bcos 1st, he took his pay and 2nd, he broke my BIG pen. haha. the deal is sealed off when the mix & make ice cream which cost $12.50. gd deal. hahaha. and den we had cookies cookies sundae, of cos this is not his treat lah.. we had to pay.. crap with them.. make fun of each other.. and yup, it made my night worthwhile. and when i’m back alone.. the thought of getting transferring came back and it makes me sad.. but i know i have gotta accept. but first, i need a job. and when i am transferring? anytime after OCT 31st.

it’s a fun saturday, we, i mean i, wear the wig and i look so weird. HAHAHA. guo bin wore the wig and the mask.. and it looks so funny… i told tim he shd help the wig cut layer so it will look nicer. LOL. have a fun time laughing at myself. lol.

and i woke up at 2plus in the afternoon.. so i was supposed to meet bear out for dinner today and some kbox session but den fang chew smsed me and said he’s unhappy today so i went to acc him instead. his grandma passed away this morning and he’s stressed about work, so i kept him accompanied.. we went to kbox to sing because the boxing machine he wants to hit is down.. and den after that we went to have dinner at esplanade open space coffee shop.. both of us was like shivering until dying. haha. thanks to his “they never on air con? den i will “hot” until die.” and thus, we were almost cold till death. HAHAHA. and even though i was wearing my jacket, i still feel so damn cold. sigh. it’s a raining day today.. and den i took a bus home bcos i don’t wanna stand with those.. i’m not going to mention what color in case u say i’m racist. LOL. anyways, it’s time to go to bed. *yawn* sometimes i wondered, which part of a man’s brain is spoilt that they likes me. haha. nite world.

what am i thinking? i don’t know. but today is a very stupid day to start with. i am only late for 2 minutes and den get myself change in the toilet, she who shall not be named 2 talked like i took forever to get myself changed. and so she complaint to tim. =] how nice of her. i’m really so glad that she complaint. she said i disrespect her. didn’t even apologise when i was late. the thing is, she was clearing table and i have apologised to she who shall not be named when i time in… but she who shall not be named didn’t hear me.. at all that is. and she who shall not be named 2 blamed us or rather me (bcos i was doing the drip coffee) that we didn’t drip the coffee fast enough to give CQ.. and so i said, drip fast overflow, we get scolding.. drip too slow oso get scolding.. and den she who shall not be named 2 ask fizah if i was trying to find fault with her.. i seriously think that she has something against me that she always find fault with me. and when i tried to be nice and inform her of her mistake, she get angry with me. wat’s wrong with these ppl? and fizah told me & sue that she who shall not be named is quite against the idea that fizah teach us paperwork.. they are scare aren’t they? den why are we doing ordering? it’s not our job. it’s captain’s job. duh~ anyways, they celebrate she who shall not be named 21st bday today.. and i dun quite like the fact that she hugged me bcos she was hugging everyone thank you. and let’s hope she will be smart since she gets older. it’s a bit surprising that she who shall not be named didn’t side she who shall not be named 2 nor me for that issue. listening to both side stories. which is what a manager shd do. and i always think she who shall not be named 2 as ridiculous. trying hard to get a double promotion? wait long. and still she wouldn’t get it. snobbish person like her will remain as what she is now.

anyways, went to CQ to have dinner with wati, sue & fang chew. i had yuzu dory today but, the one damien cook is nicer. =X had chocolate fudge cake for wati‘s bday cake.. and had a fun time chilling out.. the only thing that we didn’t do is to take pic. hahaha. uncle jeremy keep bullying me. zix too. and i finally saw louis. HAHAHA. kinda weird to see him get his new haircut or was it because i haven’t see him for a very long time? =X and we said hi, but he was busy so we didn’t get to talk much.. sigh.. den i took bus home and slept the whole journey.. =X and saw jesslin at the bus interchange. i didn’t hear her calling me bcos i just woke up plus fang chew was blocking her. hahaha. oops.. den went to the bank to withdraw money and den head back home. hope to meet up soon~ =]

你那么爱他 – 李圣杰
直到爱消失　你才懂得　去珍惜身边每个美好风景　
只是他早已离去直到你想通　他早已经　
不再对你留恋最后的你　开始了一段挣扎你那么爱他　
为什么不把他留下为什么不说心里话
你深爱他　这是每个人都知道啊
你那么爱他 为什么不把她留下
是不是你有深爱的两个他
所以你不想再让自己　无法自拔直到爱消失　你才懂得　去珍惜身边每个
美好风景　只是他早已离去直到你想通　他早已经　不再对你留恋
最后的你　开始了一段挣扎
你那么爱他　为什么不把他留下
为什么不说心里话你深爱他　这是每个人都知道啊你那么爱他 为什么不把她留下是不是你有深爱的两个他所以你不想再让自己　无法自拔你那么爱他　为什么不把他留下
为什么不说心里话
你深爱他　这是每个人都知道啊
你那么爱他 为什么不把她留下是不是你有深爱的两个他
所以你不想再让自己　无法自拔